Beautiful Day

    Saturday, June 25, 2005  
The prophetic school

I went to the prophetic school again tonight.

What a night!

The leaders had their plans of teaching for the night, but from the first minute of the meeting the Holy Spirit came and decided to take over the meeting completly.
Powerful words concerning the whole group of people, as the words were being spoken, people just shook and reacted in different ways. There was a new annointing released, a giant new step, an overall sense of breakthrough.
Then they prophesied over me, each and everyone of them, and I had a prophesy tape of about half an hour, concerning just about every area of my life. It was just awesome. I was completly overwhelmed by the love of the Lord that was in every word spoken.
On the way back home as I was driving I listened to the tape afresh in the car. I just couldn't stop shaking all the way home(you should see what a crazy driver I had been, crossing lines, wriggling In fact I'm still shaking now, about 3 hours later. I just feel so full of the spirit that I might just....explode! lol
It was just sooo cool.

    As seen by Susan @ 1:44 AM

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    Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Hillsong Conference

Hillsong Conference is just round the corner, the week after next. I'm getting excited now....yay!
I think it's around 26,000 people registered now for day time delegates, not counting the thousands of volunteers and the free nights.
The speakers are Reinhard Bonnke, Joyce Meyer, Michael W Smith, etc. It's gonna be awesome!
I'm volunteering as a host again, and the kids will be singing in the kids choir doing their 2nd kids album.
The Bible College is doing their field intensive training thing, no classes held for 4 weeks... so I've got quite a bit of time to muck around...hehe
I'm really enjoying this Bible college now, actually I'm starting to think a bit seriously about getting a proper certificate or something.
I started out just doing one subject for fun last term, then this term 3 subjects. I guess these just wet my appetite.
I've been going to a prophetic school every week(one night a week). One of the prophecies they gave me there was I'm gonna be a preacher(speaker)....hmmmm... that's something new, I've actually never thought about that. I don't know if that word is valid or not, but it did get me more interested in getting more education in the Bible college. I kind of thought before why bother for a certificate or degree, I'll never gonna use it... I still don't think I'll use we'll just see.
The prophetic school is really cool. I ran into an old friend from Port Macquarie at Hillsong Women one day, and she asked me, why don't you come to our prophetic school? And I asked, are you gonna give me a word? She said, I would if you come. So I went, and it was cool. Everyone got about half a dozen people prophesied over them. It's kind of funny, although I had been in a prophetic church for a couple of years, I was never properly trained. I do believe I've got the gift, but sometimes I can get wild. So it's actually quite a good opportunity for me to get sharpened up a bit. I really miss the atmosphere where people prophesy to each other...I'm just really hungry for that.
Other than these, I'm just busy reading, trying to do my assignments properly....the "prophetic literature"(subject at college)is a bummer, heaps to read. I should have just chosen a subject like Genesis or Romans....oh well.

    As seen by Susan @ 10:50 PM

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    Friday, June 10, 2005
Hillsong women - Vicky D'Orazio

I haven't been writing much about the teachings at Hillsong church for a while. In a way I'm busy, in another way I feel somehow a bit disconnected from the spirit. The teachings were good, I've got the notes, but I just wasn't touched or moved as much as I'd like to.

Yesterday it was different. The "Wow" factor came back to me. I loved it to bits. It was a message just for me. I expected early in the morning to hear a message just for me, and I got it.

Lucinda Dooley was the hostess. She has such an ability to define the colour of an atmosphere. She set the tone perfectly.

Vicky D'orazio was amazing. I can't remember I heard her before. Maybe I have.
Her message was knowing who you are and free to be you.

She started with a little story of her own. She always had a loud voice. She served in her local church faithfully. She didn't get any chance of any leadership roles, but she was trusted to lead 4 praise songs before someone else led the worship songs. She did the praise lead for 10 years. Then one day a man came up telling her that she was screeching. That word really hurt her. She took that word in, and she made a decision to never again let anyone else saying that she's screeching. So she changed her tone of voice. She tried husky voice. After a while she's struggling with her voice problem. So she went to see a doctor. The doctor simply confronted her:"You are not using your natural pitch!"

She's now an international speaker. She knows that God called her to be a Jack hammer. But for years she tried her best to be a sweet nice quiet girl. And now people fly her around the world just to be loud.

In Matt16:13 Jesus asked the disciples who did they think he was. Some said he's Elijah, some said he's Moses... Although people has different opinions, He wasn't moved or affected by what they thought He was. He knew who He was.
Simon had always been called and regarded as Simon, the meaning of the name being a reed, unstable. But Jesus renamed him Peter, meaning a rock. That revelation changed his life.

Jeremiah 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you."
Before you were even created, you existed! Before you were formed, God already had a plan for your life. We can only discover ourselves in Him.
People go to all kinds of strange places trying to find themselves... We listen so much to other people's voices, listen to the voices of our own insecurities,etc. rather than listen to God's voice to find out who we really are.

Discover Jesus, then you'll discover yourself, and your life will be transformed upon that revelation.

    As seen by Susan @ 11:43 AM

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    Wednesday, June 08, 2005

I've been to councelling sessions many times and I've heard numerous teachings about forgiveness, I've done it so many times I thought I knew all about forgiveness until the issue with my Dad came up again.

My dad had been very abusive for most of my life. He had a serious problem with his temper. I grew up under the shadow of his rage.

I tried to forgive him many times. Yet he remained the same and I had to keep myself out of his reach so that I didn't have to forgive him again and again.

For a while my husband and I were trying to confront him telling him where he was wrong. We couldn't get anywhere. There was no way for him to see he did wrong and there was not a chance for him to say sorry.

Then I felt the Holy spirit whispered to me, "if you want him to say sorry, then you've got to say sorry first."

After battling for a while I decided to let the Holy spirit flow. I started out writing a letter, actually started out pretending, thinking I'd just throw it in the bin after I finished writing.

I told him in the letter exactly how I felt. I felt violated, suicidal,totally powerless as a little girl facing the rage of a violant,adult man. Then I told him that I hated him. And because of that hatred I failed to see his love for me and failed to love him as a daughter. I sincerely apologized to him and asked him to forgive me. I forgave him.

It cost me nearly a whole box of tissue while writing that letter. But I felt the flow of the Spirit. I couldn't believe the power and beauty of the words that came out of my letter. I didn't throw it in the pin....I couldn't wait to give it to him.

I gave my dad a couple hours quiet time to read my letter while my husband and I went out. And after I came back my dad collapsed before me. He totally remorsely repented. He suddenly realised for the first time in his life all the wrongs he did to everyone in the family and to the people around him. He couldn't felt more sorry. Then we took communion together and we hugged.

After he went home he repented to my brother. My brother wept and wept. He told me later that as an adult man he only cried twice in his life. The first time he was so hurt by my father's rage that he left home, and this the second time when my father apologized to him and asked him for forgiveness, he just couldn't stop crying.

My father has been a very different person ever since. Other people have kept telling me how different he has been since his visit to Australia.
He has become a very loving person. And he has been so supportive to me.
I'm so glad that I can have a loving dad again and I'm really thankful that God enabled us into reconciliation. It feels wonderful.

    As seen by Susan @ 10:35 PM

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The challenge of faith

After being a Christian for a while, I guess most of you would have had some kind of encounter with God and will be familiar with the terms like purpose driven life, the calling, vision, promise,etc.
Which requires faith.
Faith is a journey. If it's a calling, it has to be a journey. It leads to the fulfillment of life, it's about who you are, why you are created, it's about your dream. Moreover, it's about God's dream in you.
It's a big thing.
But the challenge is, along the path of faith, not so much with if we're willing to believe or not, willing to sacrifice or not, at the root of the challenge lies the doubt of whether this calling comes from God or not.
Is this God or is this the devil? Is this God or is this just me making it up?
Did I see an angel or did I see someone came in the form of an angel?
What if I give everything I have to this faith only to find out later that in fact I'm so dumb stupid? More so, what if I think it's faith while everyone else all agree it's dumb stupid silly?
I guess for Abraham, if he really know it's God, then killing Isaac is not too much of an issue. But what if the voice telling him to kill is from the enemy?
Are you sure the voice you heard in your spirit is from the Holy Spirit?

Faith usually requires a big amount of sacrifice. It's like talking to a real estate agent about the purchase of a property. Can you trust that person? What if all he's telling you is just a lie?

At the Bible college I'm doing a subject called prophetic literature. At the moment we're learning about the life and ministry of Jeremiah. To me, Jeremiah is truly a hero.
He prophesied and prophesied and prophesied. He had failure after failure after failure. Nobody wanted to listen to him. Every time he prophesied he got himself into trouble. Nobody supported him. The things he saw with his eyes were so discouraging to his faith. Yet he kept walking in faith.

In the end only God can prove who He is. And only by His power are we sustained in our walk in faith.
At the root of the challenge of faith is we don't have faith. Only God can give faith. Faith is a gift.

Our God is truly an awesome God.

    As seen by Susan @ 9:39 PM

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    Sunday, June 05, 2005
Love others as yourself

Paul Scanlon from UK gave a message at Hillsong leadership vision night the week before last.
The message kept coming back to me and I think there's a lot of truth in it.
In our church the two greatest command has been shortened to the phrase, "Love God, love people". Yet Paul gave us the insight as to the key of the second greatest command:"My greatest gift to you is a healthy me, and your greatest gift to me is a healthy you." He said that by developing oneself you're giving the best of yourself to others.

The second commandment is "love others as yourself."
I used to be involved in counselling for a little while. The most unexpected factor I found is when I seek to help other people, I helped myself at the same time. When God gave me a word of wisdom, an insight to a situation concerning other people, that same knowledge, same insight helped me with my own situation.

So, it's not selfish to love yourself, because by loving yourself you're giving the best of yourself to others; and you're not losing anything by loving others, because by loving others you're loved at the same time.

    As seen by Susan @ 2:24 PM

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About Me

Contact Me:

My picture

My beloved
You hold me now
Some Chinese sayings
The Word becomes flesh
Audible voice
A few recent pictures
Back to school
The battle goes on

My other blog
Jia Lin

Some Other Posts
China trip
Death of seed
Mother's day thoughts
Rachel and Leah

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